Mystery Science Theater En Masse

Special Episode 2: Brewdening Love (Part Thirteen)

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37– No
Erin: STOP MARKING MY CHARROTERS GAY!!11 THEY R NOT GAY, U R.

Sonia: Oh, that is incredibly immature. This is not the third grade!

GO AWEY AND STOP FLEMMING MY STORI.

All: Um... no.
Manic: Besides, it's called "riffing the living pants out of your crap". Google it.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o

NOOOOO, wardy was leafing me for another gril and it WAS JENNY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Amy: Yeah, so?
Miyu: Wow, you know you have problems when your boyfriend is leaving you for a grill.

I wok up creaming becos of the drem.

Kyo: And wet dreams were the last thing that I wanted to see in this fic.

I new ward woodnt leaf me for Jenny becos I am hoter than Jenny anyway.

Sonia: You meant "more delusional", right?

I got out of bed and wen to the barthroom to get cleen and not think abot Ward leafing me.

Cassy: Even though he already did.
Jessie: And then she offed herself because of that, and the audience cheered. The End.

OoooooOOOoooO

I weny to scool and ward was ther in him car. I went over to him and he lacked sad.lc.

Wgats rong? I asked concerndly.

Nothing, He said anger and brewdinglu. I dint like it.

Manic: But I thought you liked that sort of thing. Man, you are so confusing.

Look Erin, we nead to talk abot things." Ward sad growly.

What do yu meen sexah?" I assed and flucked my eyes sexahly at his diection.

Sonic: Did she just screw her eyes?
Sonia: Eww.

JOAN I DOT LOV YOU ANYMORE!! He cvreamed at me and then he ran sexahly away.

Cassy: Ugh, there's so much of that "creaming" stuff!
Jessie: That's what happens when you hold back on that horniness.
Amy: Wait, he was in his car! Why didn't he just drive away?
Sonic: Because he's Fred Flintstone. Must've bought one of the very first Volvos from the Stone Age.

I feel to the grond and cried rivers of water from my eye.

Miyu: For heaven's sake, would you get those freaking eyes checked by a doctor?!

WHY DINT HE LOVE ME ANYMORE???

Kyo: *raises his hand* Ooh, ooh, I know! Is it because you're a giant asshole who needs to be smited by yours truly?
Miyu: I would normally reprimand you for that statement... but it's not wrong when it's true.

And then Jenny cam and raped her arm arounf my chess.

Sonia: It's really hard to say that there are no homosexual characters when there are sentences like these sprinkled around the fic.

Whats wron joan? She assed best friendly like.

WARDS LEAFT ME I slopped at her fase with my hard.

Amy: Um, shouldn't you be slapping Edward because he left you? Just asking.

Jenny looked hut but I think she understool. I dint care but because i no she wanted to steel ward away form me anywy.

Sonic: Hey, um... there's another girl who wants to steal him from you, and it's his canon "love interest".

O0o0o0o

I ran home a cired all the way. I ran to me rom and slemmed the door so my alcoholic dad coudnt com in an lectur me. He was at worek anyway, he was a lawyer so he wood bew home late.

Manic: Somebody's been drinking their memory cells away, and it certainly wasn't Dad.

(ERIN: JOANS DAD IS NOY GAY WITH BRAIN!!!!! JUST BECOASE YOR AN ALCOHLIC DOSENT MAKE U GAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!)

Kyo: Where in the blue hell did she get that warped logic and that random note from?
Cassy: Her ass?
Kyo: Yeah, I'm going to have to agree with that one.

I on my bed and smashed into the pillow. I was so anger that I coud kull Ward but that was aganst the Lords teechings. Then I loked on the foor and ther was a card. Then I had an idea, the VOLTIRE COUD HALP ME!!! AND THEY COLD KULL BRIAN SO THAT SINNARS WOOD STOP MAKING MY CHARROTERS GAYU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1

Sonia: Yes, killing somebody is terrible. But hiring somebody to kill your intended target is okay!
Amy: Wow, way to break the fourth wall and then some. And why do the Volturi have business cards?
Jessie: I don't know, but thank the Lord that she's not a role model.
Everyone else: Amen to that.
Jessie: And thank goodness that hiring me to off somebody is rather expensive.
Sonic: Um, Jessie? No offense, but... who the heck would want to hire you right now?
Kyo: Yeah, man. I mean, your track record's worse than that Nina woman.
Jessie: Oh, shut up.

I got dressed in leether boots and blak stookings with a shiny blue miniskirt and a sexah army pint tanktop witch made my boobs lok hawt and big so Ward would be jeelous for dumping me!

Manic: Also, don't forget to do horrible things! It's okay once you pay lip service to God!
Sonia: Something tells me that somebody will now throw some Holy Water on her.
Miyu: *adjusts glasses* I believe that she really needs to dip her brain into the cleansing pool that is known as "logic".

I then culled becca and assed if she wanned to cum to the voltares with me.

Everyone except Cassy: Uh... what?!
Cassy: There are no damned words for that sentence! Argh, I need the bleach!
Jessie: *dumps a bucket of brain bleach onto Cassy's head*
Cassy: Thank you...
Jessie: Wait, you're seriously going to put the bucket on your head now?
Cassy: Yeah, dude. I think I'm better off pretending to be blind for the rest of this fic.

She said she woold but she had to do sume maury stuff frist.

Amy: Oh, man... please don't tell me that she's still looking for the father of her child. It's the nineteenth attempt!
Sonic: Ames, you need to quit watching that show.

I drove my car.

Becca and me were in the car and we were both amnger at Jenny for being am UN CHRISTINA BLACKSTABBING BITCH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11111111111111111111111111111111111111111111. I decieded Becca coold be my best gfrind insteed.

Sonia: It's nice to ignore the fact that you basically stole one of Jenny's boyfriends for a short while, too.
Miyu: Hmph. Some friend.

We stoped the car ouitside ther valtoures house and we went inside. The valtourie were siting there wathing us.

(JOAN: I don like the valtorys names becase they are old and uglah so I gave them hawt names.)

Kyo: I gave you an ugly word for a name. Guess what it is.

Nickalas got up and he had hawt hair wictch lookd lik gold and was wering designer jeens. I coold see becca starring at him, but the volturies were all marred so she couldt have him. All the other valturies were hawt to and wereing designer cloths escept for Ralph how was old and uglah (Enir: RALPH IS AN UGLAH NAME OK SO THATS WHY HES NAMED RALPH!!)

Cassy: Hey, my voice can bounce off this thing a little. Anyway... it's nice to see that somebody got the true message of those books. And if I took off this bucket, you would see me roll my eyes at that.
Miyu: Then remove the bucket, Cassidy.
Cassy: I don't want to.

"WAT DO YU WANT JOAN?" nickalas assed in a boaming roaring voiuce.

"I want you to mak Edward my husband and kull brian and jenny." I aked sexahly why flucking my eyelids seductivately. I was so gald that we had wore hawt clorhs. Becca was woring an off the shalder green top and tight jeans and high heals.

Sonic: For the last time: Nobody gives two craps about what you or your friends are wearing every other sentence. Nobody.

The valtore were thinking when ALICE FLU INTO THE ROOM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11111111111111111111111111!!!!!!!!!!!11111111111111

Manic: Holy crap, that's scary!
Sonia: No, it's not.
Manic: Somebody was thinking in this fic!
Sonia: Oh, that is scary!

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o

Wuit does alice3 want. Find out in the next exsighting chaper!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1111111111111

Jessie: We went through thirty-seven chapters. None of them were exciting. I could sue your butt off for false advertising, you know.

NO SINNARS ALLUWED TO READ IT OK. BECOISE THEY DON'T FALLOW THE LORDS WEIGHTS AND HIS TEECHINGS AND THEY AR TYING TO BRING THE DEVAL INTO MY LIF!!!!!!!!!1111111111111111111111111111111

Kyo: At least the devil taught me how to spell properly.
Cassy: You just had to smite your way through school, huh?
Kyo: Probably.

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