Mystery Science Theater En Masse

Special Episode 5: The Final Struggle (Part Five)

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~Chapter Nineteen: Sour Dreams~

Keiko: *sarcastically* I guess we don't have to deal with a crappy dream in this chapter, huh?

"What is this place?" Kyo whispered as he examined his current surroundings, then he felt someone pressing against his back.

Axl: Can we have a description of our surroundings, please?
Kyo: It's a white space. Enjoy it, Spikes.

"Oh, Emi..."

"Yes, Master Kyo?" the young girl quietly whispered.

"I don't know what's happening here, but you should keep your guard up."

Benimaru: Oh, now he's lost just like we are! This is seriously not a good sign here!

"I understand, but you should know something."

"What's that?"

James: I already know that it isn't Emi, so... *as Tsuki* You're going to die in two seconds. Anything else you'd like to know?
Rory: *as Kyo* Yeah, I'd like to know how you can divide pi. Personally, I like to divide it with a knife and fork.
James: *stares at Rory* You're not funny, Hancock.

"I'm not Emi, you fucker!" she screamed as she violently kicked the Kusanagi heir to the floor, causing a small amount of blood to seep from the corners of his mouth.

Emi: More ketchup packs, hooray!

"What have you done to her?!"

Mai: She's not here, so she's obviously dead. Get with the program, you ninny!

"I haven't done anything to your precious girlfriend... but Master Kusanagi had the pleasure of doing that. Here, you can have what's left of her." Tsuki said as she grabbed Emi by the neck and slammed her to the ground.

All except James and Rory: *cringing* Holy crap!
Rory: Suddenly, I'm excited!
Everyone else: *points at the chapter's title*
Rory: *groans* Stop spoiling the good stuff for me!

"Emi?! No... this can't happen..." Kyo said as he took her into his arms and looked into her half-closed eyes.

"Don't you dare die on me..."

James: Eh. If she did, this fic would end. *thinks for a moment* Actually, that's not a bad thought at all! End this stuff, yeah?

"It's okay, Master Kyo." the Tsuki heiress whispered as she weakly wiped away a tear from her lover's face.

Kyo: And then he revived her with a kiss, just like in a crappy fairy tale.
Emi: No, that's a Disney movie, Master Kyo.
Keiko: No, that's "Sonic '06", big sister.

"You... bastard..." the Kusanagi heir growled, glaring into the clone's lifeless eyes.

"I presume that you'll be joining your girlfriend shortly, but until then, let's have Master Kusanagi perform the honors for you."

Axl, James, Rory: *chanting* Cremate! Cremate! Cremate!
Mai: *hides her face in her hands* I do not know that squirrel, that man, or that hedgehog.
Benimaru: I, uh... I can't blame you for that, Mai.

"I don't care... as long as I'm with Emi, that's what truly matters to me..."

Then Kyo simply closed his eyes, waiting for his death sentence...

Kyo: *joins Axl, James, and Rory in the "Cremate!" chanting*
Emi, Keiko: *stares at Kyo in a confused manner*
Benimaru: *looks at Mai* And now I truly know how you feel.
Mai: Thank you for understanding.

But it never occured.

Kyo, Axl, James, Rory: Oh, damn it!
Emi: Well, we already knew that it was a dream.
James: Yes, but why couldn't it transfer to real life?!
Emi: *shrugs* I don't know. It's... just a fanfic... I guess.

It only caused the Kusanagi heir to scream as he shot out of his sleep, sweat trickling down his face and muscular body...

Emi, Mai: *faints*
Everyone else: *casually throws smelling salts on Emi and Mai*

And Emi simply groaned as she turned to face him and opened her eyes that were clearly seen with drowsiness.

Keiko: *takes the red pen from Mai* It's... "clearly visible with drowsiness".

"Master Kyo... what's the matter?" the Tsuki heiress asked as she held her lover's arm.

"It's nothing. Just go back to sleep, Miss Emi."

"Are you sure? I mean, you were screaming... and is that sweat?"

Kyo: *tosses a towel at the screen* Yes, it is.

"Yes, it is."

Everyone except Kyo: *looks at Kyo*
Kyo: Okay, this is scaring the crap out of me right now.

"Oh, it's just another one of your nightmares.

Axl: Wow, she's really casual about it, huh? *as Emi* Oh, I'm sorry that you had another nightmare about my death, Master Kyo!

If you want, I can comfort you..." Emi whispered as she used her hand to wipe his sweat away, then she slowly planted a loving kiss onto his lips.

"Miss Emi... I..." Kyo muttered as he let a quiet sigh to barely escape from his lips.

Benimaru: Yes, nothing beats the power of the healing womanhood!
James: Sounds like every other crappy Mary Sue fic.

"Don't worry, it'll be alright. Just rest now..." the young heiress whispered before she drifted back to sleep.

"Arigato, Emi-chan." he whispered back as he did the same.

Keiko: *places Emi and Mai back into their seats* And the moon isn't made of cheese, huh?
Rory: *constructing a model of the moon from cheese* This one will be.

The next morning, Kyo slowly opened his eyes and stared at the ceiling, trying to replay the dream that had occured last night.

Emi: *shakes her head* Oh, this fuzziness is awful. Anyway, why would you want to replay a dream that involved your death?
James: Because he's a masochistic little thing.

Unfortunately, before he could figure anything out, he heard a few words that were being whispered to him...

"Kusanagi Kyo... you will pay for shunning me..."

Axl: Oh, boy... someone didn't give Bella Swan the attention that she needed!

"Oh god, not this shit again..." the young heir muttered as he threw the bedsheets off of his bed, and that action caused his young pupil to wake up.

Mai: *wakes up* Oh, what happened?
Axl: You swooned and fainted.
Mai: *mumbles* Oh, that's wonderful. *in a normal voice* Anyway, I guess he forgot that his girlfriend existed for a change.

"Nnn... Master Kyo..."

"What do you want, Emi?" he rudely growled, causing her to say nothing in response as she grabbed her school uniform and left the bedroom... and in a split second, he immediately recognized the tone of voice that had escaped his lips not too long ago.

Keiko: Never heard of "Think before you speak", huh?
Benimaru: Nobody follows that rule anymore. Go look at the idiots that whined on Twitter and Facebook when Obama won his second term.

"Damn it... Miyuki was right about that tournament..." Kyo mumbled, then he softly sighed as he stared out of his bedroom. And almost as if she were on cue, the sporty girl decided to take the time to make her entrance.

Rory: *shakes a fist* Curse you, cliché sitcom scripts!

"Oh, Kyo-san..." she whispered, triggering a feeble grunt from the flame-user...

Kyo: There you go; "I" don't want to talk to you. *pulls out his own red pen* And that last set of ellipses should be replaced with a comma. Thank you.
Emi: *surprised* Master Kyo...?
Kyo: I've learned a few things, Emi. Don't be surprised.

"I know you've been through this before, but you shouldn't let this one get to you, knowing that this is probably Kusanagi's plan and all."

James: No shit, Sherlock.

"Yeah, I guess you're right."

"Okay, then let's head out. You can't start a good day in that sour note of a mood that you got there."

Rory: Head out? You mean... he's not going to brush his teeth or anything like that?
Mai: You certainly know how to take everything to heart, Rory.

And with those words, the young heir gradually opened up to a brighter mood.

But that was this morning.

James: *wearing a dunce cap* Oh, delight me with your ever observant narration, author!
Axl: Whoa, you're cranky today.
James: Pretty hypocritical of you to say that.
Axl: *grimaces*

Now he was sitting in class, letting his mind wander...

It was far away from reality...

Benimaru: *holds a bag of marijuana* I believe that this was the cause of his extremely vivid daydreaming.

And so, he thought about her, regretting the rude voice that he sent to her earlier and imagining a better mood with her... holding her in his arms as she did the same, and gazing into her eyes as she performed that action.

But there was a problem...

Keiko: I know; it's those damn ellipses.
Emi: *snickers*

Her eyes... they showed very little emotion.

Very little emotion.

Rory: Very, very little emotion.

And the sweet smile on her face slowly evolved into an extremely twisted smirk.

"You... you're not Emi..."

Kyo: *grumbles* What the hell was your first clue, genius?

"My, you catch on pretty quickly..." the twisted clone whispered as she readied herself... "Ima, Kusanagi Kyo... shine."

"Nani?!"

Benimaru: Let's reiterate; she just told you to die. Have fun, you.

And before he knew it, her sharp nails forced themselves to drive into his back, sending him into intense pain...

But that was only his dream.

Axl: That's one crappy dream.
James: *with the marijuana bag in his hand* Yes, it is.
Mai: James... what are you doing?
James: Enlisting the help on an old friend. That's all.

However, in reality, the young heir let out a howl that was filled with pain as he threw his head back and his eyes shot open... then he slumped forward as he slowly lost consciousness.

Kyo: I'm now convinced that my pansified self is not human. Nobody can act that insane.
Keiko: You obviously haven't visited a psych ward, Kusanagi.

"I told you that you would pay..."

Then a few hours slowly passed, with the young heir slowly slipping back into reality in that time... then he let out a faint moan as he opened his eyes, and came face to face with his young pupil.

Rory: Ow, that time whiplash did a number on my neck! And where are we now?
Emi: We are in the Twilight Zone, Mr. Hancock.

"Ah... Emi..." he quietly whispered as he attempted to sit up, but she stopped him from doing that.

Benimaru: And then she laid on top of him.
Axl: *plays '70s porn music*
Mai: *stops the music* That's not going to happen here.

"I'm sorry about that, but Miss Remi said that you shouldn't move for a while."

Mai: As a matter of fact, she should put him in a body cast for the rest of his miserable life.

"Tch... I'm fine, I don't even need any more rest. I had enough of that when I was knocked out in the first damn place."

"Oh, will you stop being stubborn for once, Master Kyo?"

"Hey, I'm not being stubborn, I'm just telling the truth. I'll be fine, and you know that. Now give me a little kiss, and stop worrying so much."

Kyo: Holy crap, I'm actually sounding like myself here! I need to enjoy this moment! *waits a few seconds* Okay, moment's over. Let's get this crap over with.

"Okay... if you say so..." the young heiress whispered as she leaned forward, then she stopped as soon as she noticed something...

Rory: The end of this fic!
Everyone else: No!

"What's the matter?"

"Master Kyo... your right eye is red."

"That's probably nothing."

"No, I mean... it's blood red."

Axl: Then that poor sap needs to get some Visine.
James: Either that or he fell forward and impaled his eye.
Axl: Oh, that's gross.

"What? You have got to be kidding me..."

"I'm not kidding about that... Kusanagi..."

Kyo: *plays a cheesy soap opera theme*
Rory: What's this?! The insane shadow clone has managed to inhabit the young heir's body once again?!

Then she heard the young heir's silent laugh as he slowly shut his eyes...

Emi: A "silent laugh"? That exists?
Keiko: You can find them in the same box that has those "pretty smiles".

"My, you're a smart one, Emi."

"What do you want?"

Benimaru: He probably wants to ravish you again. And if that happens, I will break a watermelon with my own forehead.

"I want you to know this one simple thing..." the controlled heir hissed as he grabbed her arm and pulled her down.

"What?"

"This tournament... will be your death sentence if you wish to partake in it."

Keiko: Well, duh! You tried to kill her in the previous story and you almost succeeded! Why are you warning her about her impending doom now?

"Hmph, that's what someone like you would definetely say. Now let me go."

"I will, but under one condition. Where's that kiss...?"

Mai: *as Emi* Right here! *punches Kyo in the face*
James: *as Kusanagi* Unfortunately, you've punched the wrong face. Did you forget that I'm using your master as my little puppet?
Mai: *as Emi* Oh, jeez!

"It's not coming to you."

"Really? Then I guess you'll have to feel it for yourself..." he whispered as he grabbed her shirt and pulled her into a lust filled kiss... and to make sure that she didn't leave him, he used his free arm to wrap around her waist and pinned her down towards him.

Emi: *plays with one of her marionettes* I guess this is now appropriate.
Axl: He's obviously a master of puppets.

"Naze? (Why?)"

Kyo: Seriously, you've dealt with his creepy crap in the last two fics! Why the hell are you so surprised about it now?!

"I'm only doing this to give you a warning."

Rory: *scoffs* Some warning.

"Well, this 'warning' isn't going to phase me one bit."

And with those words, she was released and was roughly shoved to the floor...

Axl: Well, she is in the school's hospital. Did she ding her head on a random radiator? Free healthcare for her!

"Emi... you are one amusing little girl. Would you care to try that heroic attempt again?"

James: Yes. Just say it. You know you want to.

"Maybe, if you didn't try to kill me before the tournament began." Emi muttered and attempted to strike with a flaming fist, but it was easily grabbed...

Emi: Oh! I guess my former self didn't heed the warnings that Miss James and Mr. Daniels spoke about!
Benimaru: Good is dumb, Emi. The cycle must continue.

"You little wench, did you forget that I am still controlling your master like the little puppet that he is?" the controlled Kyo growled as he tightened his hold on the young girl's hand, causing her to flinch slightly.

Axl: *sings* Master!
Rory: You know, if you tried to kill them now, something interesting would've happened. But no, we're stuck in limbo.
Mai: Still upset about that lack of action, Rory?
Rory: Yes, Mai. Yes, I am.

"Ah... I..."

"I knew you haven't changed when it came to strength... and before I leave, remember this one other thing. There is no place in this world for the weak to exist... and you were lucky enough to be spared for this long. Sayonara, kawaiinochan."

Emi: Well, those words sent a legitimate chill up my spine... well, that was until he addressed my former self as "cutie". Now I don't know how I should feel.

"Yeah, whatever."

James: Welcome to Dramaville High!
Kyo: Do we give her some '80s hair and some really sticky bubble gum for that?
James: Yes, we should!

the young heiress grumbled as she saw that familiar twisted smirk slowly fade... and in a few moments, she stared into the calming tone of dark brown eyes.

Benimaru: Excuse me, I have to dye my hair purple.
Keiko: I'm with you, Nikaido.

"Ah, Master Kyo..."

"You're still here, huh? I thought you left as soon as I fell asleep again."

Mai: *as Emi* Oh, and time moved incredibly slow in this fanfiction, so I brought you this... *gives Kyo a sweater* I knitted it in three minutes. This "Twilight Zone" is interesting and scary at the same time!

"Well, um... that was caused by Kusanagi... he controlled you again."

"Teme... (Bastard...) I think that he used up the rest of my energy, too."

Keiko: *takes out her red pen, removes the word "that" from Kyo's sentence* There we go. Oh, and "teme" means "you (bastard)", not just "bastard". Thank you.

"Should I stay with you a little longer?"

"No, you don't have to. You probably have to go back to class anyway."

"Yes, that's true..."

Axl: Let's see... education, boning your master, education, boning your master... had a little mind tango with your possessed master... sounds pretty obvious, huh?

"Go ahead, then. And you better not be late this time. You know that you don't want your sensei giving you that long-ass speech on why you shouldn't be dating me." Kyo said as he gently held his lover's hand, watching a small smile seep onto her face.

Rory: Okay, I'm squicked out here. Emi's made of water now!

"Heh, I guess you're right about that."

"I didn't guess, I know that I was right about that. Now go back to class. I'll see you after school, okay?"

Benimaru: Or not, considering that this universe hates having him in one piece.

"Alright." the Tsuki heiress said as she gave him a quick kiss before leaving for class.

"Kyo, who was that person that just visited?"

"Oh, that... was just Emi, Miss Remi." Kyo said as he let out a small yawn.

Kyo: *rubs his neck* Ow, my neck! What the hell!
Keiko: A random person arrived. Oh, and congratulations; you got hit by the infamous time whiplash.
Kyo: Ugh! Thank god this is almost over, or else I'd be in a neck brace!

"Heh, I didn't even hear her enter or leave. At least it was sweet of her to take her lunch break to see you."

"Yeah..."

Emi: Maybe my former self got her lunch out of thin air, too.

"Hmm, you're looking a little tired. Maybe you should rest for a few more hours..."

James: Or for eternity. One of them.

"Um, Miss Remi?"

He knew it wasn't her, thanks to the twisted smile that was beginning to form on her facial features...

"Tsuki... it's you, isn't it?"

Rory: Congratulations! You have just won a free torture session!

"Oh, that's a lucky guess, Kyo. And I'm seizing this chance to perform some damage. Since everyone else is in class... nobody will be able to hear you scream in this hallway..."

Axl: Is he attending a school for the deaf?
Mai: Close; it's a school for the deaf, dumb, and blind.

And there was nobody to even stop the female clone's assault, as she sent the young heir screaming into another state of unconsciousness...

Mai, Axl, Rory: *cringes* Ooh... ouch!
James: Well, Jesus Christ! I thought that they were going to rough him up, not kill him!
Keiko: In our universe... that is considered "roughing up".
Benimaru: Hey, I just noticed a problem here...
Kyo: What is it?
Benimaru: Where am I? I mean, I've only been in one chapter!
Emi, Keiko: That's a problem?
Kyo: *snickers* Yeah, about that... you were going to be in the next chapter. And it's too bad, Beni; we're stuck on a cliffhanger.
Benimaru: Well, I'm not the one being tortured at the end of this chapter, am I?
Kyo: I... oh, damn it!

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