Mystery Science Theater En Masse

Four Riffers, Episode 10: Mike put his frosting in Bella's cake (Part Two)

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Warning: Second verse, same as the first. It's the same victim blaming, but in a different POV.

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2. Chapter 2 edited on december 3 2011

A/N Sorry for this guys, But when all else fails and you have writers block do a chapter in Edward's POV it always get's you over the bump!

Keiko: Why do we have to read a chapter in that marbled waste of skin's POV?
Miyu: Because Stephenie Meyer and E.L. James did it as well. Bad writers are required to copy other bad writers, Miss Tsukino.
Axl: Wait. Really, author? You just started, and you already have writer's block?
Kyo: That should tell you about this fic's quality, Spikes.

Thanks again to Crevy11... Hope you feel better, can't wait till you spend the night.

*Edward's POV (of chapter one…sorry but it's still good!)*

Axl: The last chapter wasn't good at all, so why the hell do you think that we're going to enjoy this one? And it's the same chapter in this moron's POV! I don't want to read this garbage twice!
Keiko: I'll have more fun sticking my hair in a paper shredder.
Kyo: I don't know. Being hairless isn't your kind of style.

I was sitting next to my love in the torture humans call English class.

Kyo: I was sitting with three riffers in the torture that we call "this stupid garbage fanfic".

Mr. Berty was going on and on about his lecture on ' Robert Frost genius or not?'

Miyu: I'd rather listen to that.

Bella raised her hand silently next to me in the back of the class room. I automatically looked at her. What is wrong? " Bathroom.'' She whispered. Ahh, I wonder if it was more her wanting to get out of this boring lecture than needing a ' human moment' as she called it.

Axl: Wait, are you serious? This is just the first chapter in Edward's POV! What the hell?! I don't want to read the same victim blaming garbage again!

(A/N You all have this kind of teacher, I'm sure.)

Keiko: Author... shut up. Nobody wants to read your stupid notes in the middle of your stupid fic.

'What dose she want? She's ruining my rhythm, I'm just getting to the climax, the big shocker.' Mr. Berty thought.

I really doubt their is a climax. Even if their is it's not like anyone's listening.

Kyo: Charming. Glasses, I'm going to go ask the sponsor for some tires after this.
Miyu: You do that.

" Yes, Ms. Swan" Mr. Berty asked letting the annoyance from his thought's leak into his voice. " Bathroom please." I noticed as she spoke her cheeks turned a light delicate pink.

" Fine, go quickly or you'll miss more on the-" She cut him off. " Thanks.'' She must have really needed to go.

Axl: Yeah, I wish she went out of this trash fic.

She blushed deeper when she heard the chuckles and left. As Bella left the room became even less appealing.

Kyo: Like your thoughts... which were never appealing.

I felt a vibration in my pant's pocket. I was getting a text. Yes, I said text, Alice is a force of nature. A natural disaster. Pretty and interesting from a distance that draws you in. Destructive and annoying up close, that you can't escape.

Keiko: Much like this fic.
Miyu: Remove "pretty and interesting from a distance", and you'll truly have this fic.

Alice had gotten us all a cell with AT&T that's confusing as hell and is always dropping calls.

Axl: I think the author turned Ed into her mouthpiece there.

I texted now and then when Bella was gone, but I wasn't one to text and check for a text every minute of every day.

Miyu: Of course not! That's Christian Grey's job!

It was from Tanya, Unlike me, she could text for hours on no end.

Keiko: And unlike you, she's probably pleasant.

It read.

How's it going Eddie boy?

I internally groaned. She had picked up on Emmett's annoying nickname. I thought I heard my name being called in the distance, it was only a whisper. I listened closely, but heard no more.

Kyo: So you didn't bother to check. Okay... so tell me why being raped is Bella's fault again. Go on. Go on! *ignites a flame* Because I really want to hear it!
Axl: Oh, boy. We haven't revisited the worst part of this sludge pile, and he's already heated.
Keiko: At this rate, who can blame him?

I decided to text Tanya back. I looked up to make sure the coast was clear like every other human in this room. Only I didn't really need to.

Miyu: Why am I wishing for him to be atomized right now?
Axl: You know why.

When I looked up and around I saw Alice pass by the classroom door. She kept thinking.

'Crap, crap, crap, I hope I'm not late. I need to hurry.'

I was immediately suspicious. What is this little tornado up to? I put away my cell away and raised my hand.

' What does Cullen want? I'm at the really good part. What is with these kids today?' Mr. Berty thought. He is so oblivious to the rest of the world.

Kyo: And you're allergic to common sense. *mutters* Jackass.

" Mr. Cullen?''

" I forgot my assignment for my next class at home. May I call my Mother in the office to see if she can drop it off.'' I asked even though my next class is Gym, and I really doubt that their was an assignment in that class

" Very irresponsible of you Mr. Cullen, Yes you may. Go ahead.''

As soon as I was out the door I went the opposite direction of the office, following the fresh scent of Alice. I was surprised that it was intertwined with Bella's fresh, delicious scent. Why had Bella gone this way?

I followed the scent to the other side of the school. Where Alice and Bella's scent were met by three new one's.

Mike Newton, His blood, And Bella's blood .

Axl: And anyone would put two and two together on this one. But this is Edward. And we already know what happens next.

" Alice I smell blood." I said and walked into the source of the smell.

Keiko: What was your first clue, genius?

While Alice though to me,

' Edward it's not what it seems. How to explain this?'

Well, it's a good thing it isn't what it seems because it seems like Bella and Mike just had rough sex. What a relief it wasn't that. I thought sarcastically.

Kyo: Um... uh... rough sex isn't supposed to draw blood. Author, are you stupid? Have you been hanging out with that Akira moron who tried to stop blood spurts with tampons?
Keiko: Yes, and probably.
Miyu: *pushes glasses up* I think this proves our point. Little children shouldn't be writing about serious things that they don't know about.
Axl: Yeah, if people knew what they were writing about, we wouldn't be here.

When I realized what must have truly happened my unbeating heart seemed to be torn out of it's right spot and replaced with anger, and sadness.

Axl: And yet... you directed your anger at the wrong people.

" Stop lying in your thoughts Alice, I know what's going on here. Your trying to protect your friend and not your brother. Just stop Alice, stop.'' I didn't truly believe the words I had just spoken, but I just didn't want to think about any other option.

Keiko: And yet you said them anyway. Some trustworthy lover you are.

' How dare Edward think I would do such a mutt like thing.' Alice thought.

I wanted to say. I don't Alice but I didn't want to think about anything else, my heart is just to confused and broken. " I said stop.''

Then Emmet, Rosalie, and Jasper walked in. I remembered passing each of their classrooms while following Alice's scent. I just hadn't realized they'd seen me.

"I'll call Carlisle, this ought to be good.'' Rosalie said but what she thought was.

' Finally a way to get Bella out of our lives.'

Miyu: I think that much was obvious.

" Will someone explain what the hells going on.'' Emmet yelled. Emmet always so impatient.

Axl: Says the moron who jumped to conclusions without waiting for the facts.

" Bella doesn't like boundaries.'' I said distantly trying to think of any other option possible. The curiosity is getting to me. " No, no ,no don't you understand she was raped.'' Alice said compassionately.

That would explain the blood, and why would you bet against Alice? But I just couldn't think of that as an option. To know Bella was being hurt and I not their to save her.

Kyo: *sarcastically* Oh, I feel so sorry for you. I feel so sorry for you since your first option was to blame her for being raped.

' How could Edward think so low about Bella I really thought he loved her.' Alice thought. I wanted to yell to her. I did! I do!

Miyu: Considering that you haven't said anything that proved that you truly loved her, no, you don't love her.
Axl: I can't believe that we're teaching a dumbass that's over a hundred years old how to use his damn words. The hell?
Miyu: *adjusts glasses* Well, the people in the "Twilight" series were not known for their smarts, Axl.

Rosalie hung up the phone. " Well, why don't we put this issue to a vote? It seems we like to do that with big life changing issues including Bella.'' I laughed in my mind at the truth of Rosalie's words. She continued on, " Who thinks HUMAN Bella cheated on VAMPIRE Edward with HUMAN Mike? Yes or no Edward.'' Rosalie asked. Every time Rosalie yelled the difference between species was another knife in my heart it seemed like the only way to make the pain stop was to say the three letter word.

"Yes.'' I said. I could breath again.

Keiko: *speechless*
Axl: This stupid son of a...
Kyo: *facepalms, shakes his head* I hate this trash fic.
Miyu: *as her glasses lenses slowly begin to crack* Oh, no... he did not say that he found relief by blaming Miss Swan. Mr. Kusanagi?
Kyo: What do you want, Glasses? Bleepka or tires?
Miyu: I want to see him die an incredibly painful death.
Axl: *stunned* Whoa. She really snapped.
Kyo: *stammers* Um... uh... *clears his throat, turns to Keiko* ...that's under "tires", right?
Keiko: *blinks* I... don't think so, Kusanagi.

" No!'' Alice yelled. " I'll get to you later. Gosh Alice.'' Rosalie wasn't letting a chance to get rid of Bella go by.

Miyu: But can we get rid of Rosalie? I know how to perform exorcisms.
Keiko: Good luck finding her soul, because she doesn't have one.

" Well, Emmet?'' I heard Rosalie ask, but I tuned them all out and pulled out my cell. I texted Tanya without thinking,

'Tanya, we're coming for a possible permanent stay. Please get our rooms accommodated and ready for our visit.'

Kyo: Well, you never thought to begin with...

I put my phone away when Carlisle arrived. " Rose, clam down. I'll pick up Mike and drop him off at the hospital. Edward could you pick up Bella for me.'' Carlisle said the words that were meant to be a question as a statement as if he already knew the answer.

I couldn't touch her after what Newton did, I just couldn't.

Axl: Did you just say that she was... "used goods"? *sighs, smiles* Edward. May I please shove a couch made of ice up your asshole?
Miyu: I hate to defend him, but an alternate interpretation could be that he was afraid to suck every last drop of blood out of Miss Swan's body while converting her into a vampire. Considering the context of this fic, I highly doubt that.

" No.'' I answered. Carlisle looked shocked.

" Son it's to save her. Don't you want to save her?'' Carlisle asked the question that should have been the statement.

Keiko: So it's everyone's fault that they're not asking or saying things to your liking? You are such a petulant child.

Of coarse I wanted to save her, But I also needed time alone to think.

Kyo: Again... you don't think. Shut up.

" No.'' I said as much as it pained me to. Everyone gasped out loud and in mind. Then a small, slow smile crept onto Rosalie's face that made me sick.

Axl: And yet you're not saying anything to stop it. *claps sarcastically* Boyfriend of the century!
Miyu: ...is he dead yet?
Axl: Unfortunately, no. He's not dead.
Miyu: ...he needs to die. Rosalie also needs to die. This entire fic needs to die.
Kyo: So much for that fried egg therapy from earlier.

" I'll do it, we're wasting precious time.'' Alice said while grabbing Bella as carefully as Carlisle did with Newtown. We left the school without even being looked at. Although that could have been because we were running blindingly fast.

Keiko: Somehow.

After Carlisle got Newton situated at the hospital, we ran home. That's when Bella begun to stir.

She awoke on the table confused. " What, What, huh?'' She said in a jumble. I had to say something, I couldn't keep quite, I feel as if I'm going to explode. " Bella, why would you, with Mike Newton?'' I asked with pain coloring my voice. She began to say something but I tuned her out,

Axl: Asshole.
Kyo: Oh, sure! Let's ignore her while she's trying to explain herself! *sighs* Okay, tell me why I'm supposed to like this moron.
Keiko: *as she is sharpening her katana* I'll like it better when I can cut his head off.
Kyo: You want to slice his head off, Glasses wants to pull him apart like spaghetti or see him burn, Spikes wants to shove a couch up his butt, and I want to burn him up. Violence really is a beautiful thing, huh?

My phone vibrated again. It was another text from Tanya. It read:

'Sure, Edward. Is everything okay? Shall I stock up on food for your Bella?'

I gritted my teeth together when I read ' your Bella' I wished I deserved to call her my Bella and replayed.

Keiko: Again, you're saying that you don't deserve her... when all of your words and actions imply that she doesn't deserve you because she was raped. You know, there's a special term for morons like you and Rosalie.
Kyo: Live volcanic sacrifices?
Keiko: That's not the term that I was thinking about, but it'll do.

'Everything is absolutely fine. That won't be necessary, Bella isn't coming with us.'

I hit send and saw that it is only Alice, Jasper, Esme, Bella, and I still in the house. Esme whispered " Sorry.'' Then left looking truly ashamed. What had I missed?

Kyo: Why should it matter to you, you moron? You'd just complain about the info, anyway!

" Bella…why?'' I asked letting the pain of the fact that I'm leavening her again drip into my voice.

Keiko: Because once again, that's how you should treat a rape victim. Blame the victim and then leave. *sarcastically* Makes perfect sense.

" Edward stay, please you'll see.'' Alice pleaded in her voice and mind. " No Alice, no.''

Then I walked out of the love of my life's world.

Miyu: *angry* Stop calling her the love of your life! You treated her like complete trash! If anything, you don't deserve her! At all!
Axl: *sighs* I can't wait until we're done with this garbage fic.
Kyo: No kidding. *begins drinking the Bleepka* This won't numb the pain.
Keiko: You'll have a better chance if you smash the bottle over your own head and stab yourself in the stomach with the broken glass.
Kyo: You really want me to get offed along with them, huh?
Keiko: Not this time. I'm just saying that it'll be a lot less painful than reading this fic.
Kyo: I can't believe that I'm agreeing with you on that.

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